Southern Legitimacy Statement: I am in the South of Somewhere !
Look After Your Mate: An Unfriendly Guide to Support Your Struggling Classmates
We’re going to test you with some scenarios, real or similar to real-life situations, that you might encounter with struggling classmates during your time at uni. Please answer as truthfully as possible !
• How would you start a conversation and offer support to a classmate?
Why would I start a conversation in the first place?
• How would you respond to a friend who wants to leave?
I’d tell him to leave faster. I’m not holding the door open all day.
• You need to understand your friend’s diagnosis. How would you respond to someone who has an eating disorder?
Eating isn’t going to bring your father back.
• Depression?
Everyone is depressed. You’re not special because you’re sad.
• Bipolar?
Let’s remove all sharp objects from the room and make you sit as far away from me as possible.
• OCD?
Washing your hands 400 times per day doesn’t mean you can scrub away bad choices.
• Psychosis?
You’re right. Everyone hates you and wants you dead. They’re all plotting against you as we speak.
• Anxiety?
Have you been keeping up with World War III predictions?
• What would you do if your friend tells you he is desperate right now?
I’d congratulate him. Awareness is the first step towards inevitable failure.
• How would you include your friend in your friendship group?
I would tell him to make friendship bracelets, play dress-up, and get lost because I’m not his support animal, and he’s on his own. Life is tough. Get a helmet.
• What body language should you adopt in order to stay approachable?
Same as in the bedroom : the starfish position.
• How would you stay in touch with your struggling friend during the holidays?
I would mute the WhatsApp conversation.
Zoé Mahfouz is a multi-talented French artist: Y’all need to check her out. We’re so happy to have her here with us. The photo above is not she but it could be, she can do anything…
