Southern Legitimacy Statement: I have no true origin, I can claim no land, but I can claim it all, and most recently, the South too. I am a military child who moves every 2-3 years. I move so often that nowhere feels like home until it’s time to say goodbye again.
Stupid. Dumb. Emotions.
The bell rings. Last class of the last day of school is over. Hurray. I put away the few things I brought then face the Crumbl Cookie box. I pick it up and go to stand stiffly beside my teacher, while she says goodbye to other students.
“Uh, Mrs. Long?” I say. She turns to me and her face brightened.
“Aw, is that for me?”
I nod my head and hand it to her, “Yeah, I wanted to get you something special because I really enjoyed your class and I wanted to say thank you.”
We exchange a few more words, she says thank you, she gives me a hug, then I gather my stuff and walk awkwardly out the door.
Great, now all I have to do is make one final stop at the office. On my way, I look at the tall walls of the graduation hall, the paintings, the orange, “Go Bulldogs!” signs. I’m not going to see this place again, I feel hollow and bleak as I think this.
When I get to the office, there’s already a kid there, so I wait in the corner. I’m going to be okay, I think to myself, I can do this. When the other kid leaves I walk up.
“Yeah?” Says the man, he looks like a coach and I wonder if he’s even office staff.
“Umm…-” What do I say? “I need to turn in my computer.”
“Okay, just wait here a second.” And so I wait some more.
About five minutes later he and an old lady walk in and I tell her what I need.
“Okay,” She tells me, “Just fill out your information right here.”
She hands me a sheet of paper and it’s nothing fancy, I think the kid that was in before me filled it out too. I put down my first name, my last, and finally my student ID number. I hand it back to her and then slide my chromebook over.
“Um,” I say, ‘um, um, um! It’s like the only sound I know! My gosh I’m an idiot!’ “I- I lost my chromebook charger, well my sister did-” I start spewing the words out, “-because I had it down stairs so that it’d be easier to reach because I broke my leg-” My voice starts breaking and I have to stop so I won’t start crying.
“It’s okay, it’s okay,” She says to me, “it’s just a chromebook charger,” she emphasizes, “you’re fine.” I know she’s trying to be nice, but it’s embarrassing. I’m not getting emotional over a charger, I admit that I might have a few years ago but not now! That’s stupid! There’s so much more going on here than a chromebook charger!
“I know,” I tell her, “my mom is going to pay the $50 over the website or already has, I don’t really know, but I know it’s not a big deal.” Man, I sound pathetic.
“Do you need water or to sit down?” She asks me this and I sigh in defeat as they look down at me like the pitiful creature I’ve become.
“I’m moving,” I croak, “The reason I’m like this is because I’m moving, it’s not because of the charger.” I mumble.
“Ohh…” They say.
“Well, um,” I rub my cheek and look down, “My mom is going to pay the replacement fees on her phone. So, uhm, here this.. Bye.” I step away from the counter and head to the door while avoiding eye contact. Well, I think to myself, that’s one way to make it so that I never want to see this place again, at least make it so that I never want them to see my face again. Idiot, idiot, idiot. I am an idiot.
I walk out the school doors and see some friends, I walk over to them, smile and hug them goodbye. Don’t cry, keep it together, I tell myself, Don’t let them see you cry.
When we’re done I walk over to my mom’s car and wave, “Bye!” I yell, my voice breaking. Wonderful, just wonderful.
I get to the car and slump into the back seat so no one can see me.
“Excited!?” My mom asks me, obviously excited herself.
“Yep.” I sigh back, I don’t want to ruin this for her. I’m going to miss this place so much.
I look out the window and see a matching gray sky. “Goodbye.” I say.
Then my sister hands me a pickle. I smile at her. She makes everything better. I hate pickles.
